Big body and rough-and-tumble play
“Johnny, get off your brother!”
“Friends! Stop wrestling, someone’s going to get hurt!”
‘Gretchen, please stop crashing your body into your friends’ bodies!”
Does this sound familiar? I know that I have said some variation of these exclamations (if not these exact words) to the children in our care as well as my own children.
Of course, there are times that these types of interactions are not appropriate or could be dangerous, but not all the time. So, why are we so put off by the idea of our kids playing roughly with other children? Often, it comes down to thinking that this type of play is either violent or will lead to violent behavior. In nearly all cases, this is simply untrue.
First, let’s talk about the differences between big body play, and rough-and-tumble play. Big body play is boisterous, large motor play. This play uses the child’s whole body and gets lots of energy out. Running, jumping, and climbing are all examples of this type of play.
Rough-and-tumble play is physical play that includes intentional contact with another willing participant. Knocking each other over and wrestling are examples of this type of play. Sometimes, this is referred to as “play fighting,” but there is no actual fighting occurring.
Both of these types of play are crucial for typical brain development, but I’d like to focus on rough-and-tumble play today.
Why is this type of play so important? As you all know, children are constantly learning and growing. They don’t come out of the womb knowing about personal boundaries, spatial awareness, and nonverbal communication. Playing is how children learn, and there is a known connection between physical play and cognitive development. It may not look like it, but when a child sees a peer laughing, smiling, crying, or frowning, they are learning nonverbal communication skills. When a child is thinking about the next move they are going to make, how fast they are going to move etc., they are learning body awareness. All of these skills are instrumental in the development of children.
While this type of play can sometimes look dangerous, it’s the caregivers’ responsibility to make sure that the area is safe, the children are aware of the boundaries, and that all participants are willing and having fun! If all of the rough-and-tumble safety boxes have been checked, let them play and step in only when necessary. Have fun!